You're right - that is the most important thing. I don't really have a Talking About That Stuff relationship with my mum either. We just don't have the language for it, so everything is kind of unspoken. For me though, I think my sexuality is a large part of me, and I feel bad for hiding it from my mum all these years. Mum does probably know me better than most people, but she doesn't know the whole me, which is what I feel bad about. It's kind of the same with new people/colleagues I meet - I don't really consider them friends, until I let them in and see that part of me. So yeah... I think I've pretty much made up my mind to come out to my mum soonish (in the next 2 or 3 years, as opposed in the next 20). Just waiting for the right moment.