"People don't stay just because you want them to."

I feel like I'm in mourning, but I don't know what for. I've been staring off into space a lot. When I got home today, I just stayed sitting in the car and didn't want to leave.

I also experienced a bout of homicidal rage today. Two bouts, actually, but we'll not speak of the second one. -.-

So the first one. There was this guy sitting next to me in my Language and Teaching lecture and he just kept talking and talking and talking to the girl on the other side of him. And he had this really annoying loud, breathy, snorty laughter which just PISSED ME OFF TO NO END. I wanted to stab him with my pen. Or punch is face in. I really did. The lecture was too boring to concentrate on, so in the end I just started reading Stay. But even then his constant snorting laughter irritated me immensely. Wanted. To. Kill.

This morning I dreamt of climbing onto the netting of a hang glider which was really a Viking ship with wings. We glided/sailed over wind and water all the way to the staffroom of Glen Waverley Secondary College (my old high school), where I saw many of my old teachers. At the bottom of a big yellow water slide, I saw Kylie (my Year 12 English teacher whom I had a crush on). I slid down the slide whilst doing the Xena warcry to impress her, but she was angry at me and hadn't forgiven me for something and refused to talk to me. I was sad. Then I climbed back up the slide and into the hang gliding Viking ship and flew back to uni.

Um, yeah.

(no subject)

My dad has guests over again. Loud male laughter. Smoke. Grr.

My last lecture today ran overtime and as I was leaving the lecture theatre (A1 of Old Engineering), I saw Rachel Nordlinger (my old lecturer for the very first linguistics subject I ever took) come in. Outside, I saw a whole bunch of fresh-faced undergraduates waiting to enter. They were probably "Intro to Linguistics" students. I was hit by a sudden wave of nostalgia, and I stared at them for a while, wishing I could join them.

I currently have about zero motivation for anything. Zero. I was an hour late to uni today because I just couldn't get out of bed. And once out of bed, I couldn't bring myself get ready in the usual speed I have to in order to catch my train...

In fact, I don't even have the motivation to end this post properly.

*goes away*

Tania

Man. I've developed this totally weird belated crush on Tania. SO BELATED. I've written in here a few times about her, actually, over the years. Posts about how awesomely hot she is. So anyway. I found her a few months ago on Facebook, but was too chicken to add her. Then, a couple of days ago, I read The Blue Place by Nicola Griffith, which features a really hot Norwegian protagonist who's rather like Xena and the book reminded me of Tania, because there was something about Norwegians walking fast (which Tania once mentioned in a tutorial - I can't believe I still remember)... and yeah. Today I looked her up again on Facebook, and I've been trying to work up the courage to add her for the last two or three hours. I am such a n00b sometimes. Srsly.